MESA, AZ—Arriving as rapidly as doable to help a determined buyer, a locksmith was reportedly known as Friday after an area man misplaced the incantation wanted to open an historic enchanted stone chamber. “It took him 45 minutes to get right here, which is ok, however now he needs to cost me $200 simply to blast via the 4,000-year-old rune-covered doorways with shadow magic,” stated Leonard Garrison, 48, who added that he was indignant with himself for misplacing the scroll upon which was written a spell in an arcane tongue that, when chanted throughout the doomed and forsaken ceremony of alban eilir, would give him entry to the chamber the place he stored his passport, social safety card, and different essential private paperwork. “The worst half is that I've valuables like my magic goblet and scrying mirror in there, and now this whole stranger I’ve let into my house is aware of precisely the place I preserve them. Plus, with the harm he’s doing, I’ll by no means get these doorways to remain shut once more with out hiring a druid to inscribe them with unusual, esoteric seals.” At press time, Garrison had managed to get out of paying the $200 after the locksmith had inadvertently invoked the wrath of Yog-Sothoth and been solid into the Anonymous Mist.
