ARLINGTON, VA—Scrambling to tab away from the social media feed he had been scrolling by way of mere moments earlier than, native navy contractor Todd Roose reportedly took out a number of Syrian civilians Thursday to appear busy as his supervisor walked by. “Oh shoot—hey boss! Yeah, simply knocking out a number of bombings within the Center East that’ve been piling up on my desk,” stated Roose, straightening up in his seat and quickly hitting the launch button a number of occasions as his boss rounded the nook subsequent to his cubicle. “We’re nonetheless planning on that comfortable hour within the kitchenette later, proper? Superior. See you there. What’s that? No, I’m not bombing the identical kindergarten from this morning. This one should simply look the identical. Ha-ha, all proper, catch you later.” At press time, after confirming that his supervisor had returned to his workplace, Roose had reportedly kicked his toes up on his desk and gone again to having fun with a video feed monitoring an American citizen.
