NEW YORK—Stressing that the reminiscence appeared so recent and vivid of their minds, the confused nation introduced Monday that they might have sworn British entertainer Russell Model was already a convicted intercourse offender. “Fascinating…so Russell Model positively wasn’t already discovered responsible of sexual assault again in, like…2016, 2017?” stated 39-year-old New York resident Scott Hasard, echoing the ideas of 330 million People as he famous that when he noticed allegations emerge in regards to the actor, comic, and podcast host, he had assumed it was merely repackaged content material from almost a decade in the past. “You’re telling me there wasn’t a prolonged and well-publicized trial the place Model was acquitted, however then new allegations emerged? And, like, social media posts the place the ladies received referred to as liars? None of that occurred? Huh. I even really feel like I learn a think-piece about how we might nonetheless admire Forgetting Sarah Marshall regardless of his crimes. It’s most likely insane to even ask this, however didn’t he launch a comeback particular again in 2020 about how everybody tried to cancel him for the sexual assault stuff? Severely? Not even that?” At press time, the baffled nation requested what had made Model into such an unhinged and deeply annoyed particular person if all of this hadn’t kicked it off years in the past.
