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ST. CLOUD, MN—Wincing and gagging on the mere considered consuming his nemesis, choosy eater Daniel Welty refused to take a chunk of the still-beating coronary heart of his slain enemy, sources confirmed Wednesday. “Younger man, you’re not getting up from this desk till you not less than attempt your defeated foe’s pulsating coronary heart,” mentioned the boy’s mom, Kirsten Welty, who had positioned a little bit of the aorta on a fork and pretended it was an airplane as she tried to persuade him to open his mouth and savor the still-animate important organ. “See, look—Mommy likes the blood-soaked style of vengeance. Mmm, yum! Don’t you need to take in your vanquished adversary’s life-force so you'll be able to develop up huge and powerful?” At press time, the 5-year-old—who is alleged to have come round after realizing that he really fairly loved the uncooked flesh of his lifeless enemy—was reportedly demanding extra blood.
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